tag:dreamwidth.org,2009-05-01:157279beccaelizabeth's dreamwidth journalbeccaelizabethbeccaelizabeth2023-02-01T01:33:42Ztag:dreamwidth.org,2009-05-01:157279:4107486Giles and Ethan and Chaos and possibility2023-02-01T01:32:05Z2023-02-01T01:33:42Zpublic4I think the Ethan Rayne I've been building up in my head for the last twenty odd years got political in ways other people's fic mostly doesn't.<br /><br />I keep thinking about Giles/Ethan because order meets chaos and new creative possibilities emerge between them.<br /><span class="cut-wrapper"><span style="display: none;" id="span-cuttag___1" class="cuttag"></span><b class="cut-open">( </b><b class="cut-text"><a href="https://beccaelizabeth.dreamwidth.org/4107486.html#cutid1">Read more...</a></b><b class="cut-close"> )</b></span><div style="display: none;" id="div-cuttag___1" aria-live="assertive"></div><br /><br /><br />I also feel like dropping Ethan into Golarion to show him the careful what you wish for world, the high magic everyone can do this world, post multiple apocalypses.<br /><br />Easy enough to use canon from both sides to get him there, multiple Adventure Paths have characters go from Golarion to Earth, and one has time travel in case anyone wants to complain about timelines not lining up.<br /><br />Plus it's pretty easy to imagine him going 'anywhere but here' after canon left him.<br /><span class="cut-wrapper"><span style="display: none;" id="span-cuttag___2" class="cuttag"></span><b class="cut-open">( </b><b class="cut-text"><a href="https://beccaelizabeth.dreamwidth.org/4107486.html#cutid2">Read more...</a></b><b class="cut-close"> )</b></span><div style="display: none;" id="div-cuttag___2" aria-live="assertive"></div><br /><br /><br />I dont know, I havent pulled together a coherent story yet, just...<br /><br />There were so many problems in the Buffyverse and giving the power of epic punching to even a really large number of young women doesn't seem likely to fix them all.<br /><br />Neither would magic, but wouldn't it be fun to try?<br /><br /><br />So I'm trying to think up an Ethan shaped world, and see how Giles would balance it out, instead of the other way around.<br /><br />I feel like Giles probably thinks the world is basically okay, apart from all the demons and undead and cults tearing holes in the world, and that's pretty frustrating.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I keep on getting focused on villains because they keep being the ones saying <br />This Is Not Okay <br />and, well, *gestures at everything*<br /><br /><br />The people who want to preserve the world have an important point, but they can't be the only ones driving, you know?<br /><br /><br />So.<br /><br /><br />Don't reckon G/E will be the key to sorting out the worlds problems <br />but wouldnt it be fun trying?<br /><br /><img src="https://www.dreamwidth.org/tools/commentcount?user=beccaelizabeth&ditemid=4107486" width="30" height="12" alt="comment count unavailable" style="vertical-align: middle;"/> commentstag:dreamwidth.org,2009-05-01:157279:3848223Watcher revisited2020-03-20T10:23:04Z2020-03-20T10:23:28Zpublic3Dreamed of Rupert Giles today, turning up in a caravan and needing somewhere to stay.<br />He looked about the same age as he did in the first episode.<br />I looked him up. That could plausibly be the age I'll be this year. I'm catching up.<br /><br /><br />Weird, watching and feeling perspective shift as generations change.<br /><br /><br />Now I'm imagining someone saying I'm the Chosen Mentor, me and my library, so I have to whoosh off to another continent and do all That.<br /><br />... and then get criticised for my qualities as a father, despite being a very late addition to a 16 year old's life.<br /><br />... still say he's a Teacher, not father.<br /><br />Me and my cosy worn in life and my routines and vague feeling I should join a club with more people in it<br />but mostly staying home and reading (slightly older and more erudite) books...<br /><br />You know, I thought I understood Giles pretty well back then, but from here?<br />That's a Lot.<br /><br /><br />And teenagers are ever so very much younger.<br /><br /><br />Yikes.<br /><br /><br /><br />... Giles thoughts kind of day...<br /><br /><img src="https://www.dreamwidth.org/tools/commentcount?user=beccaelizabeth&ditemid=3848223" width="30" height="12" alt="comment count unavailable" style="vertical-align: middle;"/> commentstag:dreamwidth.org,2009-05-01:157279:3147371The interesting bit of today's dream2016-09-03T12:40:59Z2016-09-03T12:51:36Zpublic4Rupert Giles had been cursed so he had a month to live, and it took him a week to figure out the details, and he was probably going to be comatose for the last couple of weeks. So we had one week to break the curse.<br /><br />In order to break the curse, we had to find 7 people willing to risk their souls for him, by giving him experiences based on the 7 deadly sins.<br /><br />Sex, basically. 7 days of sex. Sometimes with cake. <br />(Cake was with Oz, because biting, and a sincere offer to make him wolfy too because obviously then he only dies of silver. So it was biting but not <i>too much</i> biting, trying to get the cake and icing and so forth without breaking skin even a little, while he was, well, mobile, and not entirely averse in the moment to the skin breaking concept.)<br />Or we needed to call/summon Ethan for Wrath, because lets face it, Ripper totally has Wrath sex there.<br /><br />See the part I resent is it turned into a running around trying to find people dream, because come on subconscious, as porn setups go that one is <i>awesome</i>.<br /><br />Dream got stuck because obviously Ethan, Oz, Buffy, Willow, Xander, and, er, Mary Sue, but then we need him to know a whole other person. And past that point the choices are not obvious. I mean, they might end up being mundanes who wouldn't know the risks, or who don't think curse breaking is a good enough reason to have Envy sex in front of former students.<br />If Jenny is alive they're not <i>former</i> students and my asleep brain noped right out. <br />If Ethan needs summoning rather than breaking out of prison then Anya is not available either.<br />Probably Olivia then. So finding and persuading her gets a lot more complicated.<br /><br />Most of today's dreams though were just running around trying to find. People, places, clothes, suitcases, a part of Australia that isn't trying to kill you, a door that only exists once an hour yet a whole year has passed on the other side, or conversely obviously a door that exists once a year yet has only had an hour, all sorts.<br /><br />I blame the power tools outside. I don't know what they're doing but my quality of sleep would appreciate them doing it a lot less.<br /><br /><img src="https://www.dreamwidth.org/tools/commentcount?user=beccaelizabeth&ditemid=3147371" width="30" height="12" alt="comment count unavailable" style="vertical-align: middle;"/> commentstag:dreamwidth.org,2009-05-01:157279:2962220Buffy: A New Man2015-07-27T13:56:47Z2015-07-27T13:56:47Zpublic2I'm lacking big thinking about Buffy of late. There seems to be a bunch about masculinity and violence, direct parallels between Spike and Riley, and Riley and Adam of course, plus some stuff about how useless Giles and Xander feel now they're not defined by their jobs. Giles and Xander keep trying to help with the violence cause they've got none jobs and want to be useful, Xander beats up Spike and it's a sign he cares, Giles gets all sad because nobody is scared of him any more. Spike of course refers to his lack of capacity to do violence in direct comparison to neutering. Masculinity and violence. Big thing.<br /><br />... big thing covered by <i>every</i> other show ever. Bored? Kinda. I mean, not bored of the episodes, but not coming out with meta.<br /><br />All of them feeling less masculine because Buffy is more successful at violence than they ever could be, and Spike and Riley eroticising that, that's a thing BtVS does a little different. Mostly if the girl is kick arse it's to teach a guy to be better than her by the end of the movie. Here she just stays better, consistently. Yaays.<br /><br />The same sex desire metaphor in the magics, the way Willow and Tara have to be, er, subtle, and the way Giles and Ethan are at the pub... a couple of old mystics, sorcerers, the night is still our time... yeah, still liking that, except for the not trivial thing where not being allowed to show stuff sucks. But the metaphors are pretty and the guys at the pub are, well, I'm coming up with plausible and I don't know if that's what I mean? Giles responding when he thinks Ethan is calling him attractive, intense eye contact, history together... you can see it happening, and you can see it in those scenes.<br /><br />Ethan and the Fyarl thing: you can read it as Ethan didn't do it. Way back at the start of Buffy, episode three, it was established that one way to undo every spell in progress was to kill the caster. But when Giles the demon breaks in to grab Ethan, Ethan says "I can't undo you if you kill me!" Okay, he could be lying about everything, but if true, it means it wasn't his spell.<br /><br />If it was then it's a classic be careful what you wish for. Giles wanted to be scary.<br />But that could also mean he got very, very drunk and did something unwise to himself. Unlikely, sure, but if you want to tell that tale...<br /><br />For G/E shippers there's the teensy problem of him apparently trying to get Giles killed when he tells Buffy "It killed Ripper and now it's trying to get me!"<br />He could simply be mistaken about how far gone Giles is, if he can't get back from there. He could be making a complex statement about tweedy Giles and his ongoing fight with his own Ripper side. Or it could just be mischief to cover his own escape. Granted Buffy tries to kill Giles because of it, but she epic fails. And Ethan predicted that, reckoned "You're only going to make him angry." If he don't believe Giles can be hurt then it's mischief, not murder.<br /><br />But then there's "I've really got to learn to just do the damage and get out of town. It's the 'stay and gloat' that gets me every time."<br />He's saying he did damage, and should have run before Ripper caught up.<br /><br />Probably meant to be Ethan then.<br /><br />But there's loopholes available if you want them. Like, what was he even doing in the place a demon was meant to rise and <i>didn't</i> anyway?<br /><br /><br /><br />... Ethan Rayne can be so much more interesting if you read a little depth into a character that's pretty much just an excuse for mayhem to happen. But mayhem of the insides to outsides sort, which is always very character based fun.<br /><br /><br /><br />Giles chasing Professor Walsh because she called him an absent male role model, always funny, but again connecting masculinity and violence. Giles feels powerless and judged, because a woman is implying a woman made herself without him. So he gets big and scary at her. Because clearly it's fun to use threats to counter words. And clearly it's more funny because it's Giles, who is usually words guy. But it's a moment that comes from him, not Ethan, even if Ethan did give him the outsides to do it.<br /><br /><br />Rupert Giles: earning his nickname since the early 70s.<br /><br /><br />I'm dissatisfied with how they used Walsh. She was evil psychology lady, and some of that was clever. Introduced doing stuff like controlling the discourse by naming herself as both good and evil versions, smart on several levels, and funny from writers cause they know what we don't. Creepy stuff that reminds me of abusers when she controls Riley just by mocking or relabelling his feelings, so he's just being college boy when he's trying to have opinions. Makes him feel small and then tells him to make her proud, so all his self worth is supposed to come from her reactions. Reworking his base code, like Adam said. Must have taken a lot of creepy manipulative work. And then making soldiers that don't ask questions... that's such a wrong view of soldiers. So all of that is perfectly good evil overlord stuff. But it's wrapped up with Riley and Adam calling her Mother on different occasions, and the weird thing with watching Riley have sex and getting rid of his girlfriend. Creepy gendered stuff. With no matching good version. I mean, if they're exploring mothers, Buffy has one of those, but no, they're just contrasting with Giles for some reason, current teacher vs ex teacher, at a point Giles is distanced from Buffy. Also there's previous evil teacher ladies but no hint of comparison. Comparing what Walsh does to what Watchers did would be perfectly reasonable, but you have to reach to other seasons to do it. Which, okay, it's season 4 and you'd expect some stuff to just be background, but I'm dissatisfied with how it turned out. There should be more women, more mothers, more teachers.<br /><br />... I'm watching Buffy and thinking there need to be more women, even though Willow and Tara and Anya and Buffy are all right there.<br /><br />I'm quite a lot creeped out by how Xander treats Anya. I mean I know she's an ex-demon but the comparisons with her behaviour have her turning up on list of autistic characters, so this time every time Xander corrects her on social skills is kind of grating. Like she's not meant to have her own thoughts and feelings but has to fit the mask on to be acceptable to him. It's not that she's actually learning compassion and empathy and that good stuff, she's just being told 'we talked about this' and changing how she behaves. I feel like Xander doesn't actually like Anya, he just likes how she makes him feel, and part of that is him feeling like he has the knowings and can teach from a position of moral superiority.<br /><br /><br /><br />I'm super grumpy today and don't know if it's the TV that's always grump making or me that's always in a grump. So it goes.<br /><br /><br /><br />The first three seasons, the basic metaphor was 'high school is hell'. Okay. They shift to college, but after the room mate episode I'm unconvinced they upgraded to 'college is hell'. More of a general 'young adulthood is hell'. Everyone trying to tell you who to be and shape you into who they want, but at the same time leaving you to sink or swim and not supporting you like you were supported a minute ago. Not knowing how to relate to adults, who are now meant to be other adults like you, but get cranky if you treat them that way and make you feel weird. Being expected to make a quantum leap in maturity and then frowned on for thinking you're mature. The whole thing with the drugged Initiative agents seems less metaphorical and more just a thing in itself, but I guess the pressure to perform physically and mentally is a college thing. Even Willow's magical lashing out is the thing where having a little power does not always go so good. So the metaphors are still there.<br /><br /><br /><br />I'll watch more episodes later.<br /><br /><img src="https://www.dreamwidth.org/tools/commentcount?user=beccaelizabeth&ditemid=2962220" width="30" height="12" alt="comment count unavailable" style="vertical-align: middle;"/> comments