beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
Fringe is just pissing me off now.
Read more... )



... quite disproportionately, because I epic can't cope with the real world news at the moment.

also I have a headache.





Okay, good things about Fringe: Read more... )



good things about the real world: my bit of it is small and quiet and not making headlines anywhere.

humans need to be more better.

so many of them are trying and it takes so few to fuck it all up.

Lost Girl

Apr. 3rd, 2014 08:15 am
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
I got the season 1 box set of Lost Girl the other day, and today I started watching.

How much am I liking it? I have the kind of headache that, even after painkillers, would really quite a lot suggest I should curl up in a dark place quietly and maybe not move so I don't feel quite so sick, yet instead I am watching Lost Girl.

I am up to the start of the third episode. The plots aren't, like, profound or astounding or very surprising at all, but I really like these characters. There are women. There are lots of women. Read more... )


So I'm hoping I can continue to like this show. Because I like it a lot right now.
I'm trying not to just get worried it'll start doing all the things I hate later. but TV has me trained.
But right now it's a kick arse urban fantasy sexy happy place.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
I give up on the day, turn off the computer, stop listening to stories, and generally admit that I have a headache...

... and my upstairs neighbour, the one who is probably the deaf lady, starts up with the singing along.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
I have little cards to put up places to advertise for an employee. Except who looks at little cards to get a job? Aren't they all online? But I have seen the online ad on the government job place and nobody replied to it. The ad is going in the local papers too. Not that that worked real well last time.

I could put it here as well but then I could never complain about my employee because they'd be people who read this. Sometimes one really needs to whine.

it would be kind of handy to have an employee again. I'm sure there were things I was planning to do. The longer I'm stuck the more stuck I feel.
beccaelizabeth: lion Prince John sucks his thumb as his crown falls down (thumb)
somedays one's options are nausea with head pain or nausea lying in the dark with feeling one should not move much in case the pain comes back.
paracetamol are wonderful as far as they go.
but then after a while I've slept as much as is happening any time soon, I've tried lying still in the dark, and it's all got so incredibly boring I'm back to deciding hey, how bad can head pain be?
... annoying stabby pain : ah, that bad.
so I'm bored, tired, nauseous, and grumpy.

lovely.

also, my ridiculous brain has decided Vegetable Noodles Are Food. Not just good food, Food. All other foods are Not Vegetable Noodles. If it decided this about something I could bring home from the supermarket then I'd just roll with it as usual, but no, it's stuck on Vegetable Noodles from the Chinese take away. I can get them delivered if I order two days worth of food at once, but it's not exactly economical eatings. I don't know, hopefully it'll go back to something easy like micro chips are food. or soup. I quite like soup usually.

What's in chinese take away vegetable noodles? I know there's mushrooms and other mushrooms and carrot and those little sweetcorn thingies that are all pointy bumpy thing and also green peppers and red peppers that are the same kind of peppers and also some things that go crunch and some things that don't and are mostly green ish. Plus there's noodles. And something that makes the noodles taste really good.
I don't think there's steam in the microwave bags of all them vegetables anyway so I probably couldn't make them myself, but it would be quite nice.

I'm hungry and nauseous. It's a very annoying conversation. Usually I don't notice hungry, but now I'm sitting here grumpy with it. And I've tried eating but I've still got the same hungry, so possibly it isn't hungry in general but Wants Noodles.

Brains are... *throws hands up and rolls eyes*
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
I have been trying to get to sleep for two hours and ended up in my head talking to TV execs about an Avengers TV series which they had made a pilot for and were totally messing up. They'd cast me as a 25 year old skinny person who made eye contact, it was horrible. ... my insomniac ramblings, they quickly become epic rants on cultural studies topics such as representations of disability in heroic fiction, even when my mary sue self could be spending those hours daydreaming on being awesome kick arse Avenger dating the whole team except Thor.

ANYway, I don't think the whole internet would be interested in much of that.

But we're going to have a SHIELD TV series, which will be kin to an Avengers series but distinctly different, so it's interesting to me at least to wonder: what will be the central question to explore in such a show?

Read more... )

The show that I would make would maybe not so much be the show that's likely to happen.

But there's interesting opportunities for asking who are the good guys and what their relation to structures of power is or should be.





I'd kind of like to be a better writer so I could answer such questions in the form of kick arse fiction, but at best for that I would require much practice.


Fanfic answers such questions while galloping past them looking at the pretty white guys shagging. I mean, not so often does fanfic get stuck in on questions other than will they won't they, but somewhere in the background is an implied answer. And sometimes it makes me tad bit uncomfortable, reading happy snuggly romantic fiction about an assassin and the guy who aims him at (exactly what kind of) enemies.

... mostly though I just like the epic trust oasis effect and carry on reading until the Happily Ever After.

Or, in this case, I go back to trying to get to sleep.
... is possibly slight bit metaphoric right there...

Brave

Feb. 3rd, 2013 01:16 am
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
I watched that Disney film Brave.
I didn't like it very much.
I liked the animation for things like water and fire and hair, but the people looked like weird ethnically stereotyped dollies and kind of creeped me out.
And Read more... )
I don't know, there's nothing particular wrong with the story, just nothing particular impressive either.
Not my cup of tea.



I have a headache and I'm grumpy and it's 0130 in the morning and maybe I just shouldn't have started a film.
*shrugs*
beccaelizabeth: Asleep; comic book Giles with his glasses off, asleep on a book (Giles sleepy)
My has a headache.
It is very, very sunny, to the point that having the blinds down really isn't helping. It's only ever this bright for a couple of hours, but these are the hours, and it is indeed bright.
And now, it sounds like the builders are here, probably fixing someone else's kitchen. With hammers.

attempting to be nocturnal in these circumstances: pointless.

chances of getting to my dancing lessons in exactly ten hours: not exactly great.
beccaelizabeth: Lady Frankenstein plugs her brain in (net access)
Was awake all night with a bad brain
having completely run out of food and drink and failed at even clicking a button to remedy that
got to sleep some time after 0800
slept all day (when I have things to do tomorow I'll probably have to cancel now)
got woke up at 1630 by my employee asking about tonight plans. remade plans as I woke up. needed shopping, so instead of dancing there was shopping.
Tesco has properly stopped stocking quorn. I went to Customer Services and made a :-( face and said now they have none of my foods. there are 6 things, fake-ham slices, gruyere cheese escalopes, quorn mince and chickenish pieces that are in the freezers anyway, and cottage pie... and something else I can't remember that I don't eat anyway. The only thing left out of my favourites buy them ever week list is the cottage pie. and that's because of sales so they won't be replacing it.
So I'll have to order in from Norwich instead.
arse.

Now I am home. I have a headache, I feel sick, I have felt that way for hours, it was a contributing factor to the suckness that happened before I could sleep, and I just want to reboot today and start over.

I am waiting for the juice to chill before I drink it. I think possibly that's not a good idea. I should have bought something in a bottle to be going on with. I'll just drink room temperature juice instead. Blergh.

Oh joy

May. 24th, 2012 09:08 am
beccaelizabeth: Asleep; comic book Giles with his glasses off, asleep on a book (Giles sleepy)
I still have a headache
and someone is doing DIY in the underneath garage.
beccaelizabeth: animated: Oz from Buffy the vampire slayer, looking at a piece of paper, then up at viewer, puzzled. (studious)
I have read the stupid Kracauer book, including the 2004 introduction that explains all the ways it is stupid, up through the chapter on Caligari. Which is the film I'm writing about. So I've read the important bits. Except it will keep on referring to it after that, so there's probably more bits I should read, but still. I read it. I win at study.

... now I have a headache. *sigh*

Also, I put little post it flags on the bits with useful or interesting quotes, and basically every page has three of them, so they're not massively helpful now. I just doubled the width of the book or something. Sticky notes of doom.

I don't know what I'm going to say about Caligari. Read more... )

... okay, actually, I seem to know what I'm going to say in my essay about Caligari.

Now I just need to make it fit the learning outcomes, refer to other sorts of art (Expressionism, pretty easy with Caligari), and draw on bits from other modules (not so much easy, will have to poke more carefully). Oh, and decide on the exact phrasing. Something like "Explore the significance of Dr Caligari's glasses" maybe.



... and I have a bunch of weeks to make it say it. Essay hand in is a couple of weeks away even without the usual extensions.


On the other hand, I still need to make a coherent presentation tomorrow and whenever I practice in my head it keeps changing. Also I am supposed to have done a critical commentary of my own short story, and I haven't, and due to the headache I'm pretty sure I won't tonight.

And I have less than 8 hours to get 8 hours sleep, but since I only woke up six hours ago that's really not going to happen.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
It is Sunday so the plan is to go have breakfast food at morrisons. Read more... )

My shopping trip resulted in two DVDs, one tub of ice cream, and some bread I asked mum to get while I was going through the checkout because I'd forgot. Very organised proper shopping trip there.

I bought some DVDs and paper and pens as a late christmas present for my brother, who is difficult to buy for since he asked only for massively expensive things. Hmmm, actually mum took two of the DVDs out, so I only bought him the one. She thinks he has the others already. Mum didn't want a DVD present for her own because she thinks its silly how we all end up with a copy. But then she doesn't borrow any. *shrugs*

So, social interaction with family, and nobody went kaboom. Win.

ETA: Though now I has headache. Not as win.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
I spent my day waiting for shopping, clearing my tv recorder onto discs, and playing a computer game. A game I did not like. A game I knew I did not like after the first level. I therefore cannot explain why I spent six hours playing it, but there you go, I did. I played it until I was about two levels from finished, and it crashed. And had not been saving my game. Since it offered no save game button I somehow assumed it was saving it. But no. So, even more pointless and futile than usual then. I thought about going to bed early, but then remembered it's New Year's Eve. Seeing as all I'll do is watch BBC2 and drink orange juice, there isn't much point, but *shrugs*.

So, okay, everyone is doing year in review stuff. Since my main feeling about the year is 'yaays, it's over!' I'm not keen on reviewing it. Also, it don't really feel over, on account of I haven't finished the essay yet. Same as every year since 2002 then.

I kicked off 2011 by writing a short story, on the theory omens attend upon beginnings, or start as you mean to go on. Seeing as I then wrote and posted unlocked 5 original short stories, posted locked another two, and did 56,517 words of a novel over the summer, I'd say that worked. Read more... )

Re-reading my year isn't on the whole making me more cheerful about it.

So: 2011: It's over!

Party!

*watches Hootenanny*
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
also some nausea. I guess my function as the oh-god of hangovers continues to apply. I don't drink, I still get epic blergh.

Dreamed something that was sort of Merlin but with Rupert Giles, because more interesting. Magic was illegal and secret. Magic was also what keeps everyone's heart beating, so there were some difficulties in definition. There were also these things, they were compasses but the needle was floating in a very interesting fluid. You could pour your magic in and keep it seperate. The fluid was clear when empty but got tinted with color according to the user when filled. And if the user died, the magic didn't. It obviously should have been more useful to them in place and ready to help them not die, but if that didn't happen, you could find, or be given, or inherit, a crystal backed compass full of magic. Getting the magic out again felt like reliving the moment the compass was filled, which could be very boring if someone routinely filtered off a day's magic at a time (Giles), but could also involve the moments before battle (some nameless knight), or running for your life (dream me's father). And, especially if you didn't know what was going on, one would react to that feeling. So when I'd inherited that magic from the compass I'd run away and kept running for days. Literally. The magic fuels muscle just as well as more esoteric things.

So then I found a compass flooded with red, and when I let the magic out I discovered someone had filled the compass at a very private moment... and I didn't think it was the magic's owner that had meant to do that. They were far too distracted to concentrate on such a thing. So I had a compass full of stolen magic. And I thought it belonged to Arthur.

Also, even if it didn't, it could be transferred to him. Magic could be taken out and put in again. That was how blood magic worked, stealing the heartbeat part from any person. Magic sufficient for spells and spectaculars was more likely to have been accumulated over generations, or in group rituals, but some people were just born shining with it. Some of them turned it into spells, some of them turned it into swordplay, and neither necessarily knew they were doing it.

Useful magic setup. Either needs a plot or becoming a PWP with Arthur in it.

Someone is nearby sawing something. I don't know why they felt the need today. I'm vaguely hoping it has to do with the front door, which has been messed up so many times I don't think swapping the glass out will be sufficient this time. Probably not though. Probably just noise.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
two and a half hours in to a new day.
(1) headache
(2) nausea
(3) reading a fic, thinking 'this is absolutely awful', and then scrolling down to read more.

I don't even know why. I think maybe because they haven't got to the kissing parts yet and they're stuck in the horrible awkward misunderstanding phase. It's just usually that's more interesting when the 'verse is vaguely coherent and the characters don't all act like overtired thirteen year olds.

got any fic recs? I've been reading a lot of SG1 and SGA, but I think I should try branching out. SGA is just all weird AUs and xovers all the time anyway, so it's not like I've been reading the SGA universe so very much.

I would do college reading except points 1 and 2 make the chances of applying brain to text somewhat slim.

It's kind of depressing to notice that one of the things I like about my recent fic reading is the theme of cranky middle aged people finding people to be cranky and middle aged with. I mean, I used to read about teenagers. Like, on purpose. Only sometimes, I mostly reading about cranky librarians or snarky really old guys. And, come to think, the theme there was all about old mistakes and regrets and finding someone who likes you anyway. It's just I used to identify with the younger persons in those pairings, and now, not so much.

I also keep reading awkward first time didn't realise they were gay and hey that explains a lot fics. I think I like them cause they're an excuse to be considerably more than teenage and never got the hang of relationships at all at all.

The point of view of someone who thinks the world is bright and shiny and full of possibility and that they'll just meet their One True Love and get a house and 2.4 children and lalalalala oooh butterflies! er, well, you know, the point of view of someone young and quite sure everything will work out their local version of normal usual happy ever after? I sooooooo can't be having with that kind of point of view. Pretty much ever that I recall, but certainly not any more.

I'm going to go and try turning off the remaining lights now. I'd try lying down in the dark but I already spent many hours in a row doing that trying to get to sleep this morning so my boredom limit has been hit.



PS Have figured out what's structurally wrong with the 'verse in the fic I'm reading. A universe where Rodney McKay thinks he's so smart, valuable, and important that he can throw his weight around and everyone from the President on down will bow to his wishes makes perfect sense. A universe where this is actually what happens has rewritten the laws of basic human interaction. They didn't send him to Siberia, Antarctica, and the one way trip version of Atlantis because he was so valued.

PPS no fair, after all that it skips the kissing bit! It just goes to later and thinking they should have done it earlier! Gah!
beccaelizabeth: animated: Oz from Buffy the vampire slayer, looking at a piece of paper, then up at viewer, puzzled. (studious)
There was reading set for Victorians and Victorianism. I should probably have read it yesterday instead of Maus. But I didn't. So now I am on page 20 of 75 and can't spot anything between there and the end that might suggest the end of the assigned reading.

*big sigh*

On the plus side, John Stuart Mill seems to be an interesting dude. It is difficult to pay much attention to the argument that actually women and men should be equal and free, on account of that argue having theoretically won already. But he is being quite methodical about his point. It's interesting. He's arguing it proper and thoroughly. Anyone opposing him would also have to read fifty odd pages and try and find an argue he hasn't demolished. Though he does start the thing off by saying that being reasoned and rational probably isn't going to help, on account of everyone believing the contrary so very much. And it did take a bit of a while to work out.

Also, there's a bit where he's saying how democratic England is already. I looked up who had the vote and I think it said it was two out of five adult males. So, two acts more democratic than it used to be, but a teensy bit not totally democratic yet.

I keep trying to concentrate and read more pages. But I have the headache equivalent of someone popping up yelling BOO at random intervals. I took a painkiller but it doesn't appear to have helped. It's not an ache, just lalalalala OW WTF oh okay lalalalala. Random stabbing in the head parts. I could live without that, you know?

Also I am tired and bored and even careful methodical dude talking about slavery, oppression, and domestic violence is still damn depressing.

I have two poems to read as well. Maybe if I flip to them for a bit I'll regain brain cells.
... I strongly suspect they'll be on the same themes. Only with more rhyming.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
A thing I don't get: I am reading about older characters. As in, not teenage. Probably middle aged. They've accumulated a bit of milage, got their scars, and while they've still got strength enough to be going on with, they're better padded than they used to be. Bodies that are comfortably worn in, like good leathers. Possibly they have less hair than they used to, probably it's going a little grey, or a lot silver. These are all features of these guys, distinguishing characteristics, and from where I'm standing good things.

So I read fic, and what happens? Some writers have them loose weight, change their exercise regimen (even characters who canonically get very plenty exercise as it is), grow their hair (!) and change their clothes (!!) and generally write about them like they got twenty years younger and decided 'pretty' was more important than 'apocalypse' in the grand scheme of things.

It's like they looked at these guys and decided 'They're so dreamy, I'll just change everything about them!'

I mean, I get writing about the younger versions, seeing how people got to be the way they are, maybe liking a certain season better than others, or appreciating the way regular exercise reshapes a person. But what I do not get is, if they're going to make them have different bodies, why start with those other bodies in the first place? Just... find different guys. Who are in fact younger already. It's not like Hollywood has any shortage.

And while it might logically seem likely they choose those guys for the personality, personal histories, relationships and all that unique stuff... no. Not so much, that I can see. I mean, there might be some really well characterised stuff that just thinks guys look better when they're starving themselves and spending all day at the gym, but the ones I've seen, if they're going to reshape their outsides, they go for the 'bringing them out of themselves', 'more confident', 'freer', totally redone different personality. Just tweak every aspect of their personality. And forget all that save the world stuff, that's what canon is for, the guys clearly would rather be in bed.

Maybe it's for the pairings. If they keep the pairings. Just... if they want them to look different, act different, and live in different stories, why do they care about the pair at all?

... okay, I'm done now.

I'd just like to read stories about (a) old friends-turned-enemies who try and make it work again and (b) teachers with adult-enough students, probably with swords involved or (c) protector/protected pairs that are based on age/ability not gender, and all of those require people with a bit of history on them. I like the little lines and the silver. It's all good. All this instant teenage reversion stuff... it's like the auton replica versions, hello plastic.
... except Rory-auton didn't look plastic, or act plastic, so plastic is not necessarily a bad thing, but you know what I mean.

I'd say it's like the Hollywood recasting of everyone but quite a lot of TV was in LA to start with. Still, LA people are less likely to look as various as British TV people, to my eye, and it gets peculiar sometimes.

Okay, I should take a painkiller and do something completely different now.
/rant
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
Emotional whiplash much?

And now the Sarah Jane tribute is on and actual real Sad is trying to happen and it's all sort of crunching up and not having room to react.
... okay, "Goodbye, my Sarah Jane", and the sad wins. crying again now. :-(
(The Sarah Jane tribute is up on the iPlayer now.)
*pause*



Also I have a horrible stabbing headache that I only really noticed when I laughed and now the story has stopped.

So, that's a gripping story.

and SPOILERS under the cut that you don't want to read before watching
Read more... )
There's so much awesome about this episode. Top of the rollercoaster time and no idea how it's going to fall out. Excellent.



and now I really really need to go take a painkiller. Doctor Who actually beat the headache for a whole episode though. good trick.

Legion

Apr. 17th, 2011 10:00 pm
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
In my continuing quest to watch whatever happens to be £3 and not a gross out comedy at the supermarket I just watched Legion. Some of it was really funny. Unfortunately it thinks it's a horror movie.
So there's a diner in the middle of nowhere under siege. Inside there are two black guys, one of them disabled, three white women, one of them pregnant, and four white men, one of whom leers at his own daughter's short skirt and is the first to die. Guess what order the rest die in?
If you guessed 'disabled black guy then other black guy' then you may have watched movies before!
... yeah, I wasn't impressed.
Then there's the roles of women. It's a base under siege story where there's enough guns for everyone. Clearly this is an opportunity for women to kick arse!
... in another genre.
Read more... )


In case you think my objections to the movie were all race and gender based, no, it was mostly just the thing where it was rubbish. It wasn't just following genre conventions, it was telling you about them first. "They've tested our strength, now they'll test our weakness!" And there's a drunk guy and an upset woman! Wow I wonder what happens now! :eyeroll:


The angel wings looked pretty cool though. Wings are not so easy to do well. There was some very flash stuff with these ones.

Unfortunately they were mostly used to stop bullets, at which point my brain commentary kept going "My wings are like a shield of steel!"

Which, you know, kind of undermined the dramatic impact.



I think I've now spent a lot more words on this film than was in any way necessary.

I also think that £3 was about £2 too much.

Sunday Rain

Jun. 6th, 2010 03:56 pm
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
Went to breakfast at Morrison's with mum and brother. :-)

Then I got sudden headache and it was less fun.

And then there was *boom* and thunderlightningrain and it was suddenly very soaky.

So there was a guy putting bin bags in the supermarket bins so mum asked him for one and turned it into a rain poncho for my brother.

I don't mind rain. I just walked home. Not many minutes. Didn't like the bits under the trees when there was *boom*. My coat got soaked wherever the rain hit it but was totally dry in lots of places. Now it's hanging up in the kitchen to drip.

Was fun.



ETA: You know, there wasn't a Severe Weather Warning before we went out, but now the whole map is orange. Useful.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
My head has ouch. Also has stupid. And my attempts to sleep yesterday really didn't work, though I did get a plot bunny. Starting with 'what would be fun to do to Owen... hmmmm, mpreg!' and then plugging that in to season 2 and seeing how it changes everything. And the tricky bit is getting him to decide to keep the baby, but after that, I think it can logically lead to nobody getting dead-dead at the end of the season.
Read more... )
So. Anyway. That's what I was thinking on today. Tosh and Owen story with mpreg baby leading to an everybody lives ending to season 2 for certain and season 3 maybe.



I realise the point of how things turned out was the winding it up until it gets really bad. I seen stories that take the sting out and unwind the characters and fix things that way. But I was trying to add extra difficult complicateds and the interesting bit was the surprising way it logically can lead to unwinding the characters and fixing things.

And a completely different Owen/Tosh relationship.
And Owen being... different kinds of complicated.
And sources of tension with Jack.



If I was writing Torchwood fanfic this would be actually tempting.


Plus make me LOL.
beccaelizabeth: lion Prince John sucks his thumb as his crown falls down (thumb)
I dreamed I watched a rocket launch but it exploded half way up and I got radiation burns and a big hole in what I could see.
Then I woke up with a headache.
Which is still here after the paracetamol.

I'd go back to bed but I don't know what I'll wake up with next time.
*grumps*
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
My head is full. Full full full. Full.
... modernism involves a lot of repeating. I have been keeping track of repeat words all day.
I only said modernism gave me a headache just the once, before taking a paracetamol.

I disliked today much less than previous modernism reading. I have decided to look at it as a set of sentences that don't necessarily stick together. Because they don't. Then the compare and contrast exercises are just about words, and I can ignore the not making sense IDIOT WRITER parts.

How do people study all day every day? I study 0900 to 1430 with about an hour of short breaks spread out between. And my head gets VERY FULL.
Also I nearly fell asleep. That part doesn't help.

And then the teacher wanted the blinds open, which means I can't see the laptop screen, so she said to move round and face the other way and I could see it, except then I could see out the window and there's lots of pretty colors and moving things in that direction. I was all attempting concentration on modernism but OH A BIRD WHEEE LEAVES PRETTY BIRD AGAIN LEAF BIRD LEAF BIRD oh dear now we have to feed back to the class.

*head freakin desk*

On the other hand I now know the difficulties in that plan.
Is why I wear my hat. Pull hat down, make world small.


Also today I discovered the flooring in the ladies loos on that level is SPARKLY with SILVER and SHINY when you move and... it was luck that I got back to class in time...
stupid loos not wide enough. I'm only a size 16, I'm not excessively wide, yet stupid things not wide enough.


Also? All these facts are equally important in my brain. The ones college is going to grade for my degree have to compete on equal footing. It's a wonder I get ANYTHING done EVER.



But I did. I went. I studied. I was a bit weird at people. My ability to construct sentences in English abandoned me at least an hour before lessons ended. The food place makes me stutter.
Oh, food place! I discovered that if they don't have any vegan burgers and you ask nicely they MAKE THEM! :-) This probably works less well once lunch rush has started so it's a bit down to luck, but I had FOOD! And happy.

And then after lessons I went to hide in the silent study area but people were having coffee and talk. So I told the librarian. Because no coffee no talking is the rule. But I've been feeling all guilty about it since then. Which is no helpful.

And then I went to my appointment with the finance advisor guy and he says probably if I fill the forms in correctly I can get funding samelike the other years and if I can't there's a fund the college has to pay tuition if you don't got it so I no need worry. So that's great.


Then I went on the bus and came home.

BUSY!



Also I listened to Doctor Who. Other Lives. It was quite amusing.

I miss my computer. I miss having my little calm down shiny things of predictable pattern and noise. I miss having my NOTES and my WORD PROCESSOR and the ability to open the clever bubble diagrams. I'd like my own computer back pls.

But I did studying anyway and made notes and not I will go sit quietly in the dark and let my head get empty again.

... okay, hopefully not empty, but...
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
Thanks to some of the buttons on the college blackboard actually working I can see that the first time I enrolled at City College was
09/09/2002
Every year since then I've started the college year. Though one year I stopped again and decided to hide under my blanket. 2003? I think. But all the other years I went to lessons and everything.
I have at least 3 more years of this to go before it turns into a BA(Hons). Possibly more.

... you know that camera effect where they zoom and pull or push at the same time and it makes distances look really freaky? And like the corridor is whooshing away while staying exactly the same length?

... some days, my life looks like that. Weirdly, in both directions.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
Romana is cool! Has adventures, saves people, and goes off to save own universe! Gets fed up of the Doctor and dumps him. Can see why. Romana gets K9 and Doctor gets Adric. Romana wins.

Story quite often didn't make even a tiny bit of sense, but hey, no worries. Had fun running around and fighting shiny skeleton warriors anyways.

Best bit: Somewhere in the middle of that my headache wore off, only having lasted about eight hours. Win! Doctor Who clearly cures everything! Or at least makes waiting around for it to get better much less boring.

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beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
beccaelizabeth

October 2014

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