beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-27 09:51 pm
Entry tags:

Dancings and shoppings

I went to dancing :-)
It didn't hurt :-)
Until somewhere in the cooldown stretches when it hurt all the way from the top of my hip on down, which was nasty, and I swore a bit out loud in class, which obviously one tries not to do.
It's weird though, everything is fine until it isn't, and it's hard to figure when it isn't, except getting in and out of the car. Maybe my sitting down hurts. boo.

But the shopping worked good and I have four movies because they were a fiver each and most of them said Classic. So they probably won't be very good by current standards but I've heard of them whenever other things copy them, so they'll be interesting.

now I'm going to eat real food with vegetables, because I rather forgot all day.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-26 09:49 pm
Entry tags:

yaay meditate

I went to meditate and it was in the middle floor with the interesting big Buddha painting and I did sitting still pretty well and better than usual.

But now I've hurt my hip. Sort of my hip, like over it? And it's fine until I want to move a particular way. And it's annoying because I was plenty comfortable and now I'm emphatically not, if I try and move sideways.

Also we did mindfulness of breathing and what I was mostly aware of was how tight my sports bra is. Probably I need a less bitey bra to meditate in.

so there were a few distractions.

But I like meditation and I'm in a better mind than when I started so is win.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-26 03:40 pm
Entry tags:

(no subject)

I had a few days full of dreams full of moments of awesome
which, cool
but today a dream that started out with having to prove a Watcher who returned after sunset was no longer alive progressed by mostly illogical stages to having to protect the president of the world while he made a speech, and failing.
Like I gave the right orders, the Flash stopped the sniper's bullet, it was all going grand
and then it turned out his bodyguard had a switchblade and ill intent

So I woke up feeling like a failure
and this has morphed into one of those swamp drag down moods
where the reason I don't date is I could never be a good partner for anyone ever
due to my worthless epic fail.

I have just woken up and nothing actually real has happened today
and yet

Days like this make my college degree worth the paper it is written on
despite the general not doing anything since I got it
because look, I achieved the best grade at a tangible thing

go me

as long as all a partner would want from me is lit crit and expertise in cult studs.



I liked much better the dreams with winning.
the ones where we have to evacuate a bunch of wheelchair users down steps while under sniper fire are somewhat stressful.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-26 02:35 am
Entry tags:

Ascension, by Jacqueline Koyanagi

Everyone go read this book. It is made of happiness and light and many good things. I have read it to the end now and it is Happily Ever After, or at least a good start.

It is women falling in love with women and starships. Many and varied women who are all unique individuals. And while there are several points where letting someone finish a sentence could have been a shortcut in the feels department, the whole yearning thing was really working, so I can forgive it.

Also you can always see why the characters would do what they do, it's not just plot yanking them around, their insecurities are built in and worked through.

The only thing I'm a bit hmmm about was Read more... )

But everyone else's happy endings were coolness. I mean you don't usually end up with a happy ending involving (big yet happy spoilers) Read more... ) I mean for a start that's more women than you even get in quite a lot of science fiction, even before you get to the eventual configuration.

I am just :-D now and want to tell everyone to go read.

It has a plot and a romance and the plot is necessary to the romance and the romance is necessary to the plot. The whole yearning having cycle is there. And there's many varieties of moments of awesome.

You will probably like this book if you like anything even close to this sort of thing.

The only thing wrong with it is there is only the one of it
and it is from 2013

Also I just saw some Amazon reviews of it, and whoever read the protagonist as a drug addict has the reading comprehension of a squirrel. She's chronically ill with a genetic autoimmune disease that attacks muscles and she controls her condition with medication. If the reviewer didn't understand that then the protagonist's motivation and urgency is going to elude them.

But! No matter what the reviews say, the book makes plenty good sense.

And it is complete in itself, with a satisfying ending, even if that is all we get.

I'll just pout because I like these characters and want to see more stories like this.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-25 06:40 pm

(no subject)

Cleaner day worked and felt easy. But that's because I gave up on the vacuum cleaner early. I still hate that thing.

I got five loads of laundry done this weekend and am once again caught up.
Something in the blacks wash, probably the shirt mum warned me about, leaked dye like woah, but I only know because the dye catcher worked good. Wash is black on black with some black bits. It remains black either way.

I started reading Ascension by Jacqueline Koyanagi last night, on the 'one chapter before sleep' plan. I actually went to sleep about three hours later, when it was past three in the morning. So. Quite liking that. Women falling in love with women and starships, like it says on the back of the books. I get the feeling a lot of the interpersonal stuff could be resolved with letting her finish her sentences or asking questions instead of making assumptions, but that's cool, the whole yearning thing is working. And the actual plots stuff is interesting. I've got half the book to go but it would really have to work at it to screw up from here.

I'm tired in an unfocused way that maybe might have to do with being awake until three but isn't being resolved by napping cause that hasn't worked. And I have no cakes, chocolate, or edible biscuits. I bought some apple raisin ones that I used to eat but rediscovered why the last packet went stale in my bag. Boo.

But today is worked pretty good.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-24 10:40 pm

Agents of SHIELD season three

Finished watching season three.
That was weirdly bland.
... also I'm still not happy with the color settings on my new TV and it keeps bothering me.

A properly absorbing story shouldn't leave me room to get distracted by the colors.

Read more... )

I don't think any character was well served by this season.

Angst with no way out and no good choices is just... boring.

I'm bored now.

To watch season four I have to plug the old recorder box back in, and I am not currently motivated to do so.

Also, I feel like they duck their own question about how to treat Inhumans by introducing all this mind control stuff.

The more Marvel I watch the more I feel mind control is a story killing choice for a universe. I mean, I had feels when it was Hawkeye or the Winter Soldier, but it creeps me out when it keeps being central. There's always a choice.

I'm not really feeling it as parts either. There was just too much of the season that didn't give me anything I'm interested in, just people not trusting each other and getting mind controlled.

I want something else. Very else. Not with these parts.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-24 04:17 pm
Entry tags:

Let's go steal a kingdom

Ugh, communication tasks day is the worst. I need assistance because phone but the people that usually help are not available. So then I just spin my wheels all day nearly but not quite getting anything done.

Today's dream was way better though. Me, Phil Coulson, and Leonard Snart. Who seem like they'd never get along but really Coulson would be perfectly pleasant while using him shamelessly, and Snart would wait for the double cross Coulson knows to expect, and it'd end up kind of like paying him to help but messier.

But. Dream. In a magic using fantasy world, where Snart was still a thief, but Coulson was some kind of cleric of Justice.

Read more... )

So I woke up feeling smugly badass, I can tell you, stealing a kingdom, putting my guy on the throne to protect the baby heir, and in so doing starting the dismantling of monarchy as a corrupt system.


And then back in real life I'm stuck on the day's tasks because if I pick up the phone I'll just stutter and fail at making sense in English.

So, you know, the dream was a teensy bit better.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-24 12:28 am

(no subject)

I have watched Agents of SHIELD season three up through Singularity.
I'm still not having as many feels for the characters as I used to. They're having big emotional stakes, I'm watching plot. It's annoying when you fall out of feels with a show.

Read more... )
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-23 06:48 pm


I was watching Agents of SHIELD season three last night and it got up to the episode where Bobbi and Hunter left
and it's supposed to be this big emotional moment
I just
How am I supposed to be sad that their actions had consequences at last?
I was just left shocked that they basically walked away from it.

I mean since SHIELD fell as an official organisation they've been just a bunch of private citizens illegally detaining other private citizens.
Read more... )

And yes, this is exactly the superhero problem. A superhero is someone who decides only their own moral judgement is relevant to who to punch.

And yeah, this is exactly the CACW problem, who gets oversight and how.

But the answers in these stories keep on being undemocratic, and acting like there's no good precedent to work with, and it's just... creepy.

There has to be some middle ground of accountability. Same reasons we need courts as well as police, and police to wear their unique identifiers where we can see them. Stories that don't want to deal with that have ducked into might makes right territory.

And that's not where I want to be.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-23 01:15 am

(no subject)

On Saturday I ate foods at reasonable intervals
did three loads of laundry, including drying and hanging up
changed the bed, with slight delay for mattress geometry
got all clean and tidy
and watched a lot of television.

the things not done list is still spectacular
but you know I think that counts as a pretty good day anyways.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-22 08:08 pm
Entry tags:

Doctor Who: Smile

I liked it, I think
Read more... )

I don't know, when the episode finished I was just kind of okay about it, but the more I think about it, the more I'm questioning the Doctor's choices.

it's a puzzler.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-22 04:06 pm

(no subject)

I tried to turn the mattress
and got it stuck broadside across the bedroom
and made myself quite dizzy tired trying to unstick it somehow.

It is turned in a different axis than originally intended
and now I need a rest.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-22 01:50 pm
Entry tags:

Assorted evils

At the Redemption conventions there's a bit called Ruler of the Universe
where mostly bad guys line up and try and get our votes for Ruler of the universe

and it's been fun, it's funny, choosing between evil!UNIT and The Master or Missy and an assortment of Centauri is just funny theatre


then this year instead of Drazi War we had Empire or Rebellion on our badges

Given those options, we rebel.
All of us?

And now reading about Marvel's latest comics drek and marketing gimmick, same with HYDRA. That is not an option. Ever. They want shops to cosplay as nazis to sell comics? Never.

And it's just rolling back the unfunny line, so instead of a joke about the wrong lizard, it's... nasty.

Like, the closer to reality the dark gets, the less funny it is.

Read more... )

It feels like media has taken a long march down into the grimdark for a really long time now
until it's all zombies and don't have to save you
and heroes are just people choosing who to punch.

I miss when the Justice League was a UN peacekeeping force made up of a really wide assortment of people including a guy who fought with a solar powered flashlight to disorient his enemies. I mean, write a world where that works. Where there's the option of being good and having it work out.

Heroes are supposed to hold that line.

Live as though the world were as it should be to show it what it can be.
Where the smallest act of kindness is the greatest thing in the world.

And I'm tired of stories that just answer that with all the angst and woe and bad consequences.

I want to see where being decent to people works out and gets them to be decent back.

Supergirl season one was pretty good like that. Some comics right now are apparently good like that. But there's all this grimdark noise too, and I'm tired of that.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-22 01:25 am

(no subject)

I watched a bunch more of Agents of SHIELD season three
and this whole 'HYDRA is secretly older than nazis' bit is just... ridiculously stupid.
Read more... )
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-21 04:41 pm
Entry tags:

Excellent dream

It started out with trying to swap a wrong color bridesmaid dress while out with the hen night, and ended up with saving mortal!Odin from a Xenomorph invasion.

... okay, it started out with accidentally magic soulmate marrying Draco Malfoy and ended up with the registry office marriage to make it official, but that is somewhat more embarrassing.

Rolling up to my own wedding wearing the blood of my enemies and formal armour provided by Asgardians is pretty much life goals, though.

Read more... )

... I must say, I wouldn't have thought of 'nude' toned dresses for bridesmaids, especially a veritable human rainbow of them, but now I'm awake I'm quite amused at the blending of traditions they represent. Like, aspiring middle class meets skyclad.

Beats heck out of pink.

But then at this total stranger's wedding reception party, held outside with some little tents, we see a bunch of strangely recognisable people. Like, Thor seems to be making puzzled faces at the punch. And Odin collected up a really piled up buffet plate, before wandering around the corner again.

After trying to get Thor's attention a few times (he's distracted because this time being mortal comes with ageing, and sagging wasn't something he'd ever thought about), we finally all set off around the corner after Odin

and straight into an ambush.

Thankfully I have a rounders bat on me
as you do
and a nice wooden sword with the end stake pointed.

... I'm not sure what theme of hen night makes these the obvious accoutrements, but now I want it...

Read more... )

It was hilarious and glorious.

And if anything could ever get Draco Malfoy's family to accept marrying a muggle, I imagine it's rolling up to the wedding with actual Asgardian gods in your entourage.

I mean, that's a conversation stopper.

Pity as a plot it would take so much filling the holes to make it either hilarious or glorious to the reader, let alone grandly romantic. I'd have to put in a lot of awake work.

But that was very fun dreaming.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-20 09:43 pm
Entry tags:

Dancing yaays

Dancing was good and we learned some more dance and are now precisely half way through

Mr P was there for the first time in aaaaaaaaages so everyone was :-)
but then he sat too close to my employee because trying to be friendly but she would rather he was friendly from an arms length away so she was not smiles.

he remembered me to say hi to though
and we remembered the dances
so those bits were good.

shopping also worked and I have fifteen five alive :-)

now i get to eat food and all is good.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-19 11:35 pm
Entry tags:

excellent talkings

I went to the Norwich Science Fiction Group
(first and third wednesdays in the basement at the Ribs of Beef)
and there was excellent talkings

three whole humans that were not me!
many topics!
never actually getting on to politics, phew!

Also I bought biscuits and shared them, so I ate only small numbers of biscuits at reasonable intervals.
... I have ate equal numbers of biscuits since I got home and opened the second packet, but, it was a good plan up to then.

I like it when there is talkings.

And there is every chance of further talkings in future weeks.

beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-19 04:39 pm
Entry tags:

(no subject)

so I thought I was well, so I ate a food
and now my insides are making these spectacular creaky noises
like it's an abandoned pirate ship while the seas get higher and it maybe might fall apart.

that's a thing.

I woke up before six, decided that was way too early, couldn't sleep, read a bit, went back to sleep, woke up after two in the afternoon.

and I had the kind of dreams that are pretty much nightmares but in vague ways that fell apart when you poke them

like I was a Torchwood agent in the last one, and my mum was worried about it, and someone she knew from parents groups at a fancy school reckoned they knew someone who knew someone and gave her the address of the Torchwood retirement home.

which was then red alert creepy because Torchwood agents don't retire.

not and know they were Torchwood agents.

so she'd visited and came back all cheerful and the nightmare part was wondering what exact variety of Torchwood things had gone, and if cheerful mother was in fact my mother any more.

also a whole sequence with glass patio doors where I've been having basically that nightmare since I was shorter than chair seats, so that one was kind of worn out, but still, I hate heavy sliding doors that could slice carrots and then aren't any decent protection anyway.

oh, and fridge doors that are airtight but see through. like you can see someone stuck in there and it's clearly a problem and the seeing doesn't fix anything. hate that.

there were tons of scattered images though
and nothing compensatory by way of plot bunnies.

being a human is weird.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
2017-04-19 07:29 am

(no subject)

ugh, it's only day two of all snap election all the headlines, and already it's giving me panic breathing and ugh.

politics is very big and not very responsive and then what?

beccaelizabeth: Captain Cold and Heatwave icons combined (Coldwave)
2017-04-18 11:16 pm

I much prefer happy endings

had a dream that was sort of an elaborate horror thing, but I picked out the good bits to make it happy instead.
Read more... )

Len's got a lot of friends, whether he likes it or not.

So we basically group hug him back to life
and when we get him back to regular reality try calling him Velveteen.

He's still got some issues. Like, if he's just the aspects of him we all loved and wanted, is he really him at all? Is the copy a good enough imitation?
I figure it's like an upload. Electric sheep.
Even if he's not the original, he's a person, so, good enough.

And he's still Cold, as in leeching heat out of people with a touch. But him and how many metas, right? Nobody much minds, they just work around.

The thing where he might not have a soul is more of a worry, but Sara's had that one fixed for her before, and knows where to go.

I like this version much better.

So, technically nightmares, but I woke up having worked out how to use them to get everyone ever back, just with maybe getting a little ate along the way. So that was fine.