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Waking up furious
Dec. 26th, 2010 01:38 pmI hate it when I wake up and the dream mood follows me. Lately it has been all waking up furious and frustrated, yelling at someone who isn't listening, while something goes terribly wrong with my housing. Today I get to add frantic with fear, because the wrong thing in this dream was someone had removed a section of gas pipe, including the stop tap, so gas was just pouring out waiting for a spark. I hit the fire alarm in the dream and then wondered if the alarm would set it off, so I phoned down to the front desk and told them the problem and couldn't hear their reply but had no time to hang around. So I run down the stairs in the dream and out the building and then... see all these famous actors. They're turning up for an award ceremony. They're going into the building. So I run back in to the front desk and have no ticket and nobody is listening and I try and explain and nobody is listening so I yell real loud and everybody thinks it is fiction somehow and keeps telling me not to give up my day job. Dreaming, frantic with fear, furious and frustrated... and waking up carrying all that around.
And once awake there's nothing I can do about the dream except keep repeating it was a dream, which doesn't do much for the adrenaline levels or whatever chemistry it is that makes you want to shout and growl and keep shouting until someone listens.
This keeps on happening. I keep trying to find a pattern in the dreams to explain it, but beyond the 'housing' thing there's no elements the same, and I'm not sure that one is significant. There's nothing to fix, I just feel like I'm yelling at an empty room.
The part where this follows being so tired I left Doctor Who on my recorder box and yet couldn't get to sleep until the small hours of the morning and now, waking, feel not so much rested as flattened... that part is getting pretty familiar too. After years of it.
Right. Moving on. Bad moods can stay in the asleep places.
And once awake there's nothing I can do about the dream except keep repeating it was a dream, which doesn't do much for the adrenaline levels or whatever chemistry it is that makes you want to shout and growl and keep shouting until someone listens.
This keeps on happening. I keep trying to find a pattern in the dreams to explain it, but beyond the 'housing' thing there's no elements the same, and I'm not sure that one is significant. There's nothing to fix, I just feel like I'm yelling at an empty room.
The part where this follows being so tired I left Doctor Who on my recorder box and yet couldn't get to sleep until the small hours of the morning and now, waking, feel not so much rested as flattened... that part is getting pretty familiar too. After years of it.
Right. Moving on. Bad moods can stay in the asleep places.