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Apr. 9th, 2015 03:07 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
beccaelizabethDear self: humans need food at regular intervals, as well as in roughly the right quantities. deciding that the food is too large and you'll leave it for later and only eat once? that is not a good decide. ever. you learn this often. regular food equals a feeling of wellbeing and general ability to get on with things, irregular food equals headaches and woe. eat. even if it is boring.
it's kind of boring being awake at 0300. I've sorted through all kinds of everything repeatedly, but now the hallway has a bunch of stuff that really needs to go somewhere else.
also I keep finding knives I thought I'd got rid of. I don't know if knives go in the bin, that seems like it would be dangerous for bin men. probably they should go straight to the recycle center. which is probably why they're still lurking in my house and not in fact got rid of already. because the recycle place is Far.
I should get a taxi and go to the Far place even if it is only half a shopping bag of stuff. it's half a shopping bag I can't otherwise get rid of.
... when I say Far I mean kind of as far as the big Tescos that I also can't figure out how to get to, but without me having been there before so I could be in error about the location and have no established map. I don't mean it's far away in most people's standards. Just tricky.
I have a whole stack of things that probably used to be parts of a computer. I think I'll have to take them to the computer shop, let them figure out if there's still data on any of it, and ask them to dispose of it. The drawers full of wires might be able to go the same way. Don't know what the vast majority of them are for, seems like they won't be useful if they're that mysterious.
Facebook is weird. Aside from the thing where it crashes my browser and I can't figure out what buttons do what, it is full of people who seem to people very different than dreamwidth/LJ/tumblr and fandom people do. Also they are on the whole people I haven't seen since school, because I don't tend to friend people on Facebook ever at all so it's just the same people as when it started. And my actual relatives, some of whom think Facebook is the internet and are the reason I ever tried to use the thing at all.
Someone from high school did the friends request thing and messaged me to ask how I've been.
... I think my brain froze?
... that's 20+ years of how I've been. I don't think they want to hear 20+ years of how I've been. It's like when people ask How Are You and you're supposed to make British noises back at them and the lowest you can be about it is 'mustn't grumble' even if you quite want to grumble, because actually it's not a question, it's just initiating neutral-friendly interaction.
Quite a lot of the bit since high school has been coming up as I went through these boxes, so it's a bit more on my mind than otherwise. Hence the brain crash when asked. Like, stuff happened? But not much of the right stuff?
How I have been since I left school: Disabled, mostly. And also I got a degree which took 11 years and finished 2 years ago.
Of the kind of things facebook people talk about, that's it, that's all, that's... my life.
I read a lot of books and watched a lot of TV and met a lot of actors and stood in all the queues and got photos with them and then got the photos signed. My many year quest to get every last Highlander promo photo I owned signed by at least one of the actors in them worked out pretty good. I can never figure out if turning up with con merch from fifteen years ago is cool or weird, but it's not like the actors don't know we've been following them around since then. I've talked to pretty much every actor I've set out to talk to, with a couple of exceptions who pretty much don't do cons. I have to check my photo stash to be sure if I've actually met people sometimes. I met Jeremy Renner at a convention back before before, when he'd been on Angel and was probably easier to book. If we're going back all the way to high school, I once made a plan to have David Duchovny phone me, and it pretty much worked. ... I hadn't taken into account I would still be me trying to make words when he phoned, and was even at the time unsure what words I managed to make, but, phone conversation, it happened.
I'm kind of well stocked with fandom things, they just only happened one or two or maybe three weekends a year. Since 1998. Which adds up.
So what do I say when people ask how I've been? People are mostly telling about their partners and offspring and pets who they refer to as offspring or occasionally partners I don't know. I just studied and got involved with stories from a lot of different angles. I didn't do anything as concrete as actually writing a book or having a career in the arts, I just, you know, read and watch. There's a ton of conversations about that, but they're only a little bit conversation about me, or answer to the question.
It's like all their gig has been biological and mine memetic.
*ponders*
eh, when the singularity comes and we're all uploads, I'll be waaaay better prepared than them ;-)
okay, I'll go find something to do. or go back to sleep. whichever.
it's kind of boring being awake at 0300. I've sorted through all kinds of everything repeatedly, but now the hallway has a bunch of stuff that really needs to go somewhere else.
also I keep finding knives I thought I'd got rid of. I don't know if knives go in the bin, that seems like it would be dangerous for bin men. probably they should go straight to the recycle center. which is probably why they're still lurking in my house and not in fact got rid of already. because the recycle place is Far.
I should get a taxi and go to the Far place even if it is only half a shopping bag of stuff. it's half a shopping bag I can't otherwise get rid of.
... when I say Far I mean kind of as far as the big Tescos that I also can't figure out how to get to, but without me having been there before so I could be in error about the location and have no established map. I don't mean it's far away in most people's standards. Just tricky.
I have a whole stack of things that probably used to be parts of a computer. I think I'll have to take them to the computer shop, let them figure out if there's still data on any of it, and ask them to dispose of it. The drawers full of wires might be able to go the same way. Don't know what the vast majority of them are for, seems like they won't be useful if they're that mysterious.
Facebook is weird. Aside from the thing where it crashes my browser and I can't figure out what buttons do what, it is full of people who seem to people very different than dreamwidth/LJ/tumblr and fandom people do. Also they are on the whole people I haven't seen since school, because I don't tend to friend people on Facebook ever at all so it's just the same people as when it started. And my actual relatives, some of whom think Facebook is the internet and are the reason I ever tried to use the thing at all.
Someone from high school did the friends request thing and messaged me to ask how I've been.
... I think my brain froze?
... that's 20+ years of how I've been. I don't think they want to hear 20+ years of how I've been. It's like when people ask How Are You and you're supposed to make British noises back at them and the lowest you can be about it is 'mustn't grumble' even if you quite want to grumble, because actually it's not a question, it's just initiating neutral-friendly interaction.
Quite a lot of the bit since high school has been coming up as I went through these boxes, so it's a bit more on my mind than otherwise. Hence the brain crash when asked. Like, stuff happened? But not much of the right stuff?
How I have been since I left school: Disabled, mostly. And also I got a degree which took 11 years and finished 2 years ago.
Of the kind of things facebook people talk about, that's it, that's all, that's... my life.
I read a lot of books and watched a lot of TV and met a lot of actors and stood in all the queues and got photos with them and then got the photos signed. My many year quest to get every last Highlander promo photo I owned signed by at least one of the actors in them worked out pretty good. I can never figure out if turning up with con merch from fifteen years ago is cool or weird, but it's not like the actors don't know we've been following them around since then. I've talked to pretty much every actor I've set out to talk to, with a couple of exceptions who pretty much don't do cons. I have to check my photo stash to be sure if I've actually met people sometimes. I met Jeremy Renner at a convention back before before, when he'd been on Angel and was probably easier to book. If we're going back all the way to high school, I once made a plan to have David Duchovny phone me, and it pretty much worked. ... I hadn't taken into account I would still be me trying to make words when he phoned, and was even at the time unsure what words I managed to make, but, phone conversation, it happened.
I'm kind of well stocked with fandom things, they just only happened one or two or maybe three weekends a year. Since 1998. Which adds up.
So what do I say when people ask how I've been? People are mostly telling about their partners and offspring and pets who they refer to as offspring or occasionally partners I don't know. I just studied and got involved with stories from a lot of different angles. I didn't do anything as concrete as actually writing a book or having a career in the arts, I just, you know, read and watch. There's a ton of conversations about that, but they're only a little bit conversation about me, or answer to the question.
It's like all their gig has been biological and mine memetic.
*ponders*
eh, when the singularity comes and we're all uploads, I'll be waaaay better prepared than them ;-)
okay, I'll go find something to do. or go back to sleep. whichever.