beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
I dreamed a long confusing no plot mess where there were two of Phil Coulson, one in the usual black suit and one in the white, and I was working for the black suit and shot the white suit guy. And now I feel really guilty? Like, it's not wearing off just because this was fictional and also a dream? Or even though he was only dead for long enough for someone else to confirm he was dead, then I healed him with magics when no one was looking.

I just feel like my brain needs scrubbing and also to maybe apologise forever.

Also in the dream the next thing that happened is Rumple from Once Upon a Time offered to make me a splice like from Jupiter Ascending. I watch neither of those and blame my tumblr reading list entirely. But also, if the Dark One is offering you an upgrade, probably you are on the wrong side right then.

Read more... )


In that particular dream though I already had power enough to heal bullet wounds, so I think mostly I didn't need upgrading, just to use what I got better.

... and if healing weren't the most useful thing, and I think that would seldom be the case but if, there's a whole section on powers in Vampire the Masquerade that points out that the ability to move flesh, bone, and blood around can be considerable more nasty than a bullet.

Still, fixing people is better.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
Am reading a comment thread where someone said
There's a lot of denial of both context and consequence in the -punk genres.
Read more... )
And all these differents would have to contrast with an old old prison colony, which would be pretty much like Earth here and now. And then you ask, who's doing it right?

By this point in the story I'll have probably talked myself out of believing any of them are.
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
I was reading a very *facepalm* argument that seemed to boil down to 'that guy doesn't look like a guy so they're not a guy even if they say so'.
Or, adding a couple of other examples, 'that x doesn't look like an x so they're not x even if they say so'.

This is *facepalm* on many levels.

I think it starts from an assumption about objectivity and empirical evidence, that is that there is a thing which is objectively true and you can gather data from looking at it to prove that thing. Which sounds all well and good until you add subjectivity and identity. Because *you* can gather data... but then you, subjectively, are processing it and making decisions on it. So the missing words in that statement up there are 'that x doesn't look like an x to me so I say they're not even if they say so'.
Read more... )
Saying what is normal - natural - true is always tangled up with this power stuff. Always already, has been since before any of us got here, will be after we're gone. Individuals standing up pointing at other individuals and saying they're not-true, not-natural, not-normal... they're engaging with structures of power that up and say 'hey, I'm the boss of you, I get to say this!'

So, then they get jumped on by all the 'you' in question who say actually, no, not. Being the boss of themselves. No changing the labels around, we chose them ourselves.

It's kind of fun to see in an academic sort of way, but since each and every time it has an impact on someone's life, it's rather non-fun, and rather important.

Therefore, also-always, not something to ignore or not care about. Tisn't just people saying stuff, tis people engaging in structures of power other people are not agreeing with.
Crunching. As of gears changing.


I am not saying trans people are deciding to go be in the boss group or opt out of it. I am not saying much about trans people at all, due to not knowing. I studied up on language and cultural studies and power as expressed through labels. And, er, if this was an essay marked on those criteria it would probably still fail. But this is what I thought of.

Some people start these arguments about identity with all that up there firmly in the 'of course' portion of the back of their minds. Of course individual has more rights over their own person than society does! Of course identity is plural and changeable! Of course you can't tell by looking!

Other people start with completely the opposite set of assumptions. And don't even notice it.

Makes discussions become arguings, methinks.
beccaelizabeth: Ethan Rayne smiles (Ethan smiles)
I read a thing about how to introduce original characters without everyone running away. It suggested starting with canon characters that didn't get much play. You have an almost blank sheet to play with and yet you already have your hook into the 'verse.

*thinks*
*uses the Ethan icon*

I was thinking the other thing that helps is if this character is an answer to a question readers already have. Read more... )

new year

Jan. 1st, 2007 08:38 am
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
so, the headache eventually went away. this is of the good.
in the whole awake I had that covered yesterday through today, I basically watched one film.
this is... less good.

also read some fic.
so far haven't found an author who sees the characters much the same way I do
though there's been some fun ideas in there.

Have to wake up later for Sarah Jane and then Torchwood. There's a big gap between them that may well involve sleep.


on the 4th I have to be awake at ten in the morning. Methinks this will involve staying up a long time, rather than the sleeping at night thing.
meh.


I still haven't done the essay as needs doing by the 12th. This may seem like a large chunk of time away, but it seemed even larger when school stopped for the semester, and yet very little collegey stuff has happened in the between.



Mostly all I've been doing is lying in the dark (still and quiet) and going over Doctor Who and Torchwood in my head. Not even making up fic. Just going over it all again and again.
Even I know this isn't a useful or productive set of thoughts.
I mean at least rewatching would involve seeing it again.
retelling it just... big lot of nothing much.

Though I find it strangely comforting.
:eyeroll:



Been thinking about Jack and Ianto. Read more... )
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
So for the last fic I did much research and decided what, exactly, Rupert Giles would drink.
Several exactlies actually, of different age and price.
One in a little sort of coffin box.


now I need to figure out about Ethan
but right up front I find the question needs to be a little broader:

what chemistry would Ethan Rayne ingest recreationally?

Including drink and smoke, yes, but not limited to that available in the off licence.



And would it make a difference if he were technically dead?




... yes, fic requires the *fun* questions.

Alcohol never been my thing. Smoking not my habit. Recreational chemistry in general quite avoided. Prescription chemistry not as much fun as it sounds. So my relevant knowledge? Absent.



I'm finding that adding Andrew to my fic bunny made it all go kind of bigger. Is interesting. I know Andrew's kind of theatrical, but that don't mean he needs the cinema size plot. And yet...



Hmmm, cultural data to acquire, add to list, what do people give for offerings in whichever country I decide her to be from? Or consume for fun? Or to go with celebration meal?
All known options rather depend on there being a local Tescos.


I'm thinking India, because it's one of those places stories come from. And also people.
This is an everso fuzzy reason to write about anywhere.

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